How many of us ever think “I wish I could do that” – well the reality is we can do and be anything we want to be. This blog may have started off sounding like a daily affirmation but it really is this simple.
Seeking out our dreams which may seem farfetched takes courage – but in order to reach that courage we need to feel and believe that we are able to achieve that goal. In a nutshell we need confidence!
Whilst some people may appear more confident than others, and seem to just ooze confidence as easy as they breathe. The truth is it is something we can all develop and improve with thoughts and actions.
When discussing confidence in accordance to the scientific book “confidence code” it states,
“And so fortunately, a substantial part of the confidence code is what psychologists call volitional: our choice. With diligent effort, we can all choose to expand our confidence. But we will get there if we stop trying to be perfect and start being prepared to fail.”
The more failure we experience the more we have a tendency to go on until we get it right. With this persistence we inevitably become better at what we are trying to achieve subsequently increasing our confidence. Below are a few approaches to take which can help increase confidence.
Do what you enjoy
Doing more of what we are enjoy sounds easy, until we start to subconsciously fill our brains with reasons why we should not do it. There’s not enough time, money is not right, it’s too much of a risk. The list goes. In her New York Times bestselling book You are a Baddass, Jen Sincero explains, “Because so often when we say we’re unqualified for something what we’re really saying is that we’re too scared to try it, not that we can’t do it”
But doing more of what we are good at can result in becoming an expert in that field. Exploiting our talents and becoming confident in doing so. Always remember, passion conquers fear.
Increase your confidence circle
Learning from others and exchanging energy is always a plus. Surrounding ourselves with confident people is an effective way for the confidence trait to rub off on us. It has been stated that
“The drive to fit in—to conform to the group—is powerful indeed. Some of the most important psychology experiments in history have demonstrated how quickly, and usually without conscious awareness, the individual falls in line with a group that is acting or thinking a different way.”
As humans we have a natural tendency to seek acceptance and want to fit in. Spending more time with confident people will help us adopt that mindset and find common ground with our peers.
What are you good at
Recognising our strengths is effective because it allows us to recognise our weaknesses. Working on weaknesses is just as important as exploiting our talents. It takes a consistent effort to overcome obstacles and meaningful action is the way to do it. Most success stories don’t come without struggles. For example, Oprah Winfrey was once fired from a news show for being too emotional. Now I’m sure Oprah knew that being emotional was by no means a weakness – however not perfect for that role. So she took that compassionate trait and used it as her gateway to success.
If you feel you lack confidence in certain areas of your life it’s never too late to change that. Be prepared to fail and understand that failure is ok as long as you don’t let it defeat you. These experiences will provide knowledge on what to do and what not to do. When you do try again you’ll go down a different path which will hopefully lead you to better results. It does take time so be patient with yourselves and make conscious efforts to recognise your growth.
Which areas in your life do you feel the least confident? Comment below